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Yokozuna is all over the opening credits even though he’s probably off to fat camp by this point. Vince and Jerry Lawler are calling the action tonight here in Green Bay, Wisconsin.
-Ahmed Johnson vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley-
Ahmed is your WWE Intercontinental Champion but Triple H was in the dog house so this is non-title. Ahmed won the title at the King of the Ring and he celebrated afterwards with Shawn Michaels. Ahmed shoves down the smaller Hunter Hearst Helmsley which is funny since Triple H is easily the size of Ahmed Johnson in the current WWE. Ahmed works a side headlock which Triple H can’t break free of. Triple H tries a hiptoss but Ahmed blocks and clotheslines Hunter down. Ahmed charges at Hunter but Hunter ducks down and Ahmed falls awkwardly to the outside. Hunter connects with a baseball slide and then sends Ahmed into the steel steps. Hunter brings Ahmed in and goes upstairs – hitting an axe-handle to the back of Ahmed for two. We go split-screen so we can hear comments from Goldust. He quotes some movies and then claims he’ll get his IC title back and he’ll bury his upcoming opponent – Undertaker. Hunter, meanwhile, gets a top rope shoulderblock (or clothesline) for two. We head to break and return with Ahmed fighting out of the corner. Ahmed misses a shoulder in the corner and Hunter goes upstairs. He leaps off but right into the arms of Ahmed. Ahmed atomic drops Hunter and then sends Hunter into the corner. Hunter is press-slammed and Ahmed covers for two. Hunter takes another atomic drop and Ahmed follows with a spinebuster. Hunter backdrops out of a Pearl River Plunge attempt, bows and then slaps Ahmed around. Hunter tries for a backdrop but Ahmed counters into the Pearl River Plunge to get the pinfall at 10:26. This wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t really close to good either. It just felt like a lethargic effort between the two. *1/4.
Dok Hendrix (Michael Hayes) interviews Ahmed about being the first-ever African-American Intercontinental Champion. Ahmed says he’s going to defend the title for all the black, white, red and green people. Lawler pokes fun at Ahmed’s mention of green people. Ahmed is the People’s Champion (not in quite those words but that was the idea he was getting across). He also says that Sweet Lips (Goldust) can find him either in the ring or in the ‘hood.
After shilling Burger King and Footaction we join Vince and Jerry at the announce table with the one and only Sunny. Sunny is definitely showing off all her assets tonight.
-Body Donnas (w/Cloudy) vs. Brooklyn Brawler & Gary Fox-
See, the joke here was that Sunny was Tammy Sytch while Cloudy was a man dressed as a woman and she (it?) looks hideous. They show clips of people auditioning to be Cloudy which is rather pathetic. The jobber team (I know what you’re thinking – the Body Donna’s aren’t jobbers?) isn’t even introduced. Brawler starts with Zip but Zip quickly gives wayto Skip. Skip does a head-scissors take down which the Brawler no-sells. Brawler tags in his partner, who I don’t recognize. Sunny teases bringing in a solo wrestler. Vince tells us the jobber’s name is Gary Fox, or something. Zip does an awful looking gut-wrench powerbomb that looks like it killed Fox. Skip does a rana off the top rope and Zip ends with a top-rope butt splash to end this debacle at 3:55. This was awful – from “Cloudy” all the way to the match itself. DUD.
Next week – Shawn will be taking on Marty Jannetty for the World Title. They quickly go over Shawn and Mary’s feud which at this point would’ve been going on for 4 years.
Cloudy chases Lawler into the crowd as we head to break. What a monumental waste of time.
-Aldo Montoya, Savio Vega & Barry Horowitz vs. British Bulldog, Vader & Owen Hart (w/Jim Cornette)-
Cornette joins the announce team and McMahon mentions they went from Sunny to Jim. That’s a bit of a letdown. Owen and Barry start off and Barry starts strong with a hiptoss and a standing knee to Owen. Barry monkey-flips Owen out of the corner and then works Owen’s casted arm. I love Owen’s selling of that. Owen escapes and tags Bulldog as Vega tags in. Vega gets a crossbody for two and delivers a pair of dropkicks. Bulldog battles back and tags in Vader who gets a good reaction from the crowd. In fact, he’s gotten the best reaction of the night so far. Vader gives Savio a short-arm clothesline as Lawler references “The Eraser,” a pre-governor Arnold Schwarzenegger film. Savio ducks a second short-arm clothesline attempt and delivers a wicked spin kick to Vader. Vader tags in Owen and Vega brings in Aldo. Aldo quickly is taken down with a spinning heel kick. Bulldog follows with a delayed suplex and Vader finishes with a chokeslam. Vader avalanches Aldo and Bulldog gets a running powerslam. He covers but gets up and tags in Owen. Owen puts Aldo in the Sharpshooter and Aldo taps out at 4:18. Hey, I’m not opposed to squash matches like this on Raw so they can save the bigger matches for the PPV’s, but Nitro changed all that and forced WWE to give away PPV quality matches every episode. This was a good squash match that showcased Camp Cornette and was good enough for its 4-minute running time. **.
There’s a commercial telling us to Unleash the Warrior Inside of You and it shows a handicapped man working out. I don’t remember where this Ultimate Warrior thing ended up going.
Brian Pillman is out at ringside with crutches and he complains about not getting his money yet from the WWE. Of course, McMahon tells him that he hasn’t wrestled yet so he doesn’t deserve the money but Pillman argues anyway.
-Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer)-
Austin was fresh off winning the King of the Ring and still has a split lip to show for it. Austin attacks Undertaker from behind two years before they’d main event against each other. Undertaker no sells Austin’s offense and knocks Austin down. I’m sure Undertaker was telling everyone that Austin hadn’t earned his stripes yes and should be jobbed because he didn’t smile enough in the locker room. Undertaker is fresh off his loss to Mankind at King of the Ring. Undertaker would win their King of the Ring rematch two years later, leading to one of the greatest spots in wrestling history. Lawler harasses Bearer about accidentally hitting Undertaker the night before with the urn. Undertaker and Austin brawl outside and Austin is sent into the ringpost. We head back to the ring with Undertaker in control. Taker misses an elbowdrop but Austin can’t connect with a charge in the corner. We return with Taker going old-school with the ropewalk. Austin comes back with a chop block on Undertaker and he goes to work on Taker’s knee. That’s a good strategy on Austin’s part. Even better – Undertaker is selling the knee injury. Austin does a version of the Figure-Four/Spinning leg lock when Goldust comes out to ruin what was otherwise a decent match. Goldust and Marlena join the boys at ringside Undertaker misses the big boot and Austin chop blocks him again as we take our final commercial break. Undertaker misses the flying clothesline once we return but Austin misses a sit-down splash near the ropes. Austin is chokeslammed by Austin and that draws Goldust into the ring. He throws the gold dust into Undertaker’s eyes and Austin is disqualified at 10:06. Undertaker slugs Austin to the outside anyway. Way to show off your new King of the Ring champion at the expense of a Goldust/Undertaker feud. The match wasn’t bad at all. It wasn’t something that’d be welcome on a PPV but for a TV match it was fine. **1/4.
Jerry Lawler makes to the ring and tries to cause tension between Undertaker and Paul Bearer.
-The Bottom Line-
Well, we had the Body Donnas, a sub-average Ahmed/Hunter match and no real matches being built up for the next PPV. On the other hand, the Camp Cornette squash match was fun and although a bit boring – the Austin/Undertaker match was nice surprise match-up for this post-PPV show.
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